Murphy'sLaw
by Judge-Douglas-Mason
Summary: Flat tire, explosive diarrhea, poison ivy and broken bones. What else can go wrong?


Disclaimer: I have nothing even remotely related to do with CBS or CSI, so thusly, these characters are not mine, they are theirs. I'm just manipulating them and bending them to my every whim.  
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Grissom and Brass were on their way to a scene in the middle of the desert when Jim hears a loud PoP!. He slowly eased the truck over onto the shoulder of the road and hopped out for an inspection. He circled the truck and found the source of the offending sound. He growled for Grissom to step out of the truck. Grissom exited and walked to the rear of the truck. The two men stared at a flat rear tire. Jim looked at Gil and sighed.

"Do we have a spare?" Jim asked

"I have no idea, never had need for one." Gil responded

Jim crouched down and looked underneath the truck and saw no spare tire. He then peered through the glass of the gate. Seeing nothing, Gil huffed. Jim pulled out his cell phone and screamed as the phone display read "no signal". Jim looked at Grissom as he pulled out his cell phone and got the same result as Jim had.

"Well, what the hell are we going to do now?" asked Jim, annoyed

"We can walk. It can't be all that far." Grissom suggested

"Walk, in the desert? They'll be investigating our deaths if we do that." Jim snapped

"Well, what do you suggest? We have to be at least fifteen miles from the scene." Said Gil

Jim walked back to the driver's door and lifted the handle to the door. The door did not open. He screamed obscenities at the top of his lungs.

"What's wrong now?" asked Grissom

"Tell me you didn't lock your door." Demanded Jim

Gil looked through the window and saw that his door was in fact locked.

He slammed his hand against the side of the truck. Jim had his answer. The sun was high in the sky and it was getting really hot out. Jim took off his shirt to reveal a plain white tankyop. Grissom took off his jacket and button down shirt to reveal he had no undershirt. He threw his garments to the ground and looked around them. He looked in the direction they had been heading and saw nothing but desert for as far as the eye could see. He turned around and further surveyed their surroundings. He saw a patch of trees about half a mile away. He pointed this out to Brass and they set out for the woods.

They reached the trees within half an hour. The tall trees and low lying foliage provided a much welcome coolness in contrast to their sweaty walk from the truck to their current destination. They were dehydrated and hungry. Grissom foraged around for some berries or source of water. He heard, in the distance, the unmistakable sound of running water. He took off like a shot and Jim rushed to keep up with him. Grissom ran for about fifty yards when he stopped in his tracks. The two men looked down at a small stream.

"Should we chance it?" asked Grissom

"Well, there's no telling what's alive in there. There could be bacteria of any sort. We could get sick, or worse" Jim pointed out.

Grissom stood and thought about Jim's words for a moment, before kneeling beside the stream and cupping his hands full of water. He drank the water and when he was done he stood and looked at Jim.

"It seems to taste fine." Said Gil

At this, Brass kneeled by the stream and began to drink up the water with a quickness. He cupped his hands and drank several times and when he was done, he sat beside Gil and sighed. They pondered their next move. They decided to find higher ground for the cell phones.  
As they walked through the woods, Grissom began to feel a pain in his stomach, the pain that is usually accompanied with frequent trips to the bathroom. Grissom ran to the nearest thickest bush and nearly didn't get his pants down in time. Jim heard a grunt coming from behind Grissom's bush and laughed out loud. In the distance he heard Grissom yell.

"Hey, don't laugh at me, you'll be next, man." Yelled Grissom

Brass thought about this and realized that he had more water than Grissom had and he would surely be the next one to running in search of an obliging shrubbery. Grissom, feeling that the worst had passed, searched around for something to wipe with, he found a small patch of ivy at the base of a tree and snatched it up. A few seconds later he emerged from behind his shrub and walked towards Jim. Jim was smiling from ear to ear. Grissom shot him a look of frustration and slight anger.

They continued to higher ground when Brass encountered the same feeling that Grissom had. Gil watched as Jim went running in search of an obliging shrub, he found one about twenty yards away. He hastily unhitched his belt and let his slacks drop down around his ankles. This time, it was Grissom who was doing the laughing. Brass was in agony; his stomach ached with pain of free flowing bowels. His ass was on fire. After a few minutes he began to search for some leaves or grass of some sort; he found the same sort of ivy that Grissom had found. He grabbed a large mass of it and cleaned himself up. He emerged from behind his tree to see the wide grin on Gil's face. Jim snapped at Gil.

"Hey, man, I had more of that water than you did, so it goes to figure that I will be in more pain than you." Jim growled

They walked up hill and were about to reach the summit when Gil began to feel an all too familiar itching feeling. He reached behind and scratched his butt, but the itch did not go away. A few minutes later Jim had the same feeling, and his itch did not go away either. So, here they were, stranded with irritated bowels and poison ivy on their asses. What could be worse than this, Grissom wondered to himself. Just as the thought exited his mind, he heard the thunder clouds rolling in and it began to rain a torrential downpour. Grissom looked up at the sky and began to laugh uncontrollably. Jim looked at Gil as if he were crazy.

"What the hell are you laughing about?" Jim asked

"I was just thinking to myself that things could not possibly get any worse." Gil said

The two men were soaking wet and scratching their butts uncontrollably as they finally reached the summit of the hill. The sun was going down now as Jim pulled out his cell and opened it up.

"Ah hah." He exclaimed He began to dial, water rushing between his ear and the earphone of the cell phone. He spoke.  
"This is Jim Brass. Grissom and I are stuck on a hill in the woods near the desert and our truck has a flat. Someone come get "  
His voice trailed off as he shifted his weight and slipped in the mud. His cell phone went flying into the air as he went sailing down the hillside like he was on a slip and slide. He slid over bushes and managed to nearly miss several large trees on his way down. Grissom, seeing his friend the human bobsled, sailing down the hill, took a sideways step, leading with his right foot, and tried to walk his way down the hill. About halfway down, his foot slipped and hit a rock, propelling him in the air and landing him face down in the mud as he joined Jim sliding down the hill.

When they both reached the bottom of the hill, Brass was all scratched up and had several gashes on his body. Grissom, who was without shirt, got the worst of it. When his foot hit the rock, he had broken his ankle and when he landed he had cracked a rib. As he slid downhill, shirtless, he accumulated numerous cuts and deep gashes all over his upper body, front and back. He tried to stand, but could not. Jim, seeing Grissom in true pain, limped over to his friend. He helped Gil up and draped Gil's arm around his own shoulder to help keep him steady.

As they stood, they could see the lights of Vegas not too far off in the distance. Jim figured it would be about a mile. Grissom reached for his cell phone and found nothing. Realizing they were without communication to secure a ride, they hobbled towards the lights of the city.

Within half an hour they reached the main road into the city. They walked along the shoulder of the road until a passing police cruiser stopped them. The patrolman recognized Jim and they hopped into the back seat of the cruiser. The police man dropped them off at Desert Palms Hospital and they were admitted. Jim was treated for his cuts and bruises. Grissom, on the other hand was sent to x-ray and it was found that he had a broken rib and broken ankle. He was heavily medicated as he lay in a hospital bed in the emergency room.  
When Jim had been discharged he called Nick to fill him in on their situation. Nick and Sara rushed to the hospital and when they arrived, they saw Grissom heavily medicated, in bed. Nick turned to Brass and asked what happened to Gil.

"He's got a broken ankle and a cracked rib." Explained Jim

Grissom was released later that evening and driven home by Sara, who stayed the night at his place, in case he should need anything. Grissom woke sometime around 4am to find Sara sitting on his couch watching tv. He hobbled his way to the couch and sat beside her. She looked at him and smiled.

"What are you smiling about?" he asked, his speech slurred. "I was just thinking about Murphy." She said "Who's Murphy?" Grissom asked "Murphy's law, anything that can go wrong, will go wrong, that Murphy." She explained "Oh, well I guess he was right." Conceded Gil

He leaned back and rested his head on the couch back and propped his broken ankle up on the coffee table. He closed his eyes and fell back to sleep. Sara covered him with a quilt from the couch and watched him sleep He was so peaceful when he slept.  
She watched him for a while before she rose and walked to the bedroom and undressed herself. She put on a pair of his flannel boxers and an old and worn Chicago Cubs t-shirt. Just as she was falling asleep, her cell rang, it was Brass.

"How is he?" Jim asked

"He's asleep again. He's on the couch. I'm going to stay here tonight in case he needs anything." She said

"Ok, I'm at home. I wish you were here, the house seems so empty without you." Jim confessed

"I'll be home in the morning or afternoon. Don't worry, I'm fine. I love you." She said

"I love you too. I miss you more." Jim said

"I'll be home later, then you can show me how much you missed me." She said playfully

She closed her cell phone and drifted to sleep.

Grissom woke several hours later, not knowing how he got from his bedroom to the living room. He rose and hobbled into his bedroom to find Sara fast asleep in his bed and in is favorite shirt. He thought to himself that she must have stayed for him, if he needed anything. He needed to lay down, but did not want to startle her. His foot and chest hurt like nothing else. He slowly and carefully sat on the bed and swung his legs up onto the bed. He leaned back and rested his head on his pillow. Sara was beneath the covers and so that there would be no confusion the next morning, he decided to sleep above the covers. He pulled a quilt from the foot end of the bed and covered himself. Within minutes he was back asleep.

Sara woke the following morning to see Grissom lying next to her. She noticed that he was above the covers and silently thanked him. It would be difficult enough for her to explain to Jim where she had slept while at Gil's, without all the confusion of them sharing a bed. She would be honest and tell Jim that Gil slept above the covers, that was the truth. She looked at the clock on the night table, it read 9:00. She rose and climbed out of bed heading towards the kitchen to make some coffee.

There was a light knock at the door and she walked over and opened it. It was Jim. He looked like hell as he entered Grissom's domicile. He saw Sara's attire and she explained that she had changed when she went to bed and put on the first things she could find. He seemed satisfied as he peeked his head in the bedroom to see Grissom above the covered by a quilt. Sara explained that she was beneath and he was above the covers.

They sat on the couch and turned on the television. They kept the volume low, so as not to disturb Grissom. They both fell asleep, leaning against each other, within half an hour. When Grissom woke he hobbled out of the bedroom and saw the cute sight on his couch. He looked at Jim and Sara sleeping in each others arms. He grabbed the quilt he had used the previous evening and covered them up. He watched them sleep, and longed to be in Jim's position, where it regarded Sara. He had always loved her, and when she started dating Jim, his heart broke. He could see that they were happy together and silently wished them the best of luck in life and love.


End file.
